Mass Confusion
by Isaboo
Summary: Left on the Citadel with a note, some money, and a place to crash, Ari Harrison will get swept up in Commander Shepard's adventures whether she likes it or not. Mostly because Garrus won't stop coming over to ask why humans like ice cream. Probably OC/KA


A/N: Here we go! I welcome criticism, but if you're an ass about it I reserve the right to ignore you. Or swear at you in a lengthy reply if I'm in a bad mood (hint: finals start soon, I'm in a bad mood). Anything without the stench of ass is fine, though.

Disclaimer: Not mine. Any of it.

State of Mind

_Mad Caddies_

_I feel the weight of the world sometimes_

_hangin' on my head_

_look for the light at the end of this tunnel once again_

_talkin' bout the right state of,_

_the right state of,_

_the right state of your mind_

_Chapter One: Ari Learns that Drinking has Consequences_

Ari groaned as she awoke, automatically clutching her head to try and lessen the pain. _Never. Drinking. Again._ She squinted against the light, trying to figure out if she'd made it to her dorm before passing out. Judging by the pristine white walls and smell of antiseptic in the air, she thought not. _Oh good, I'm in a hospital. I am never drinking again!_

"Finally awake, are you? Here, swallow this," a vaguely familiar woman smiled, and handed her a pill and a glass of water. Ari swallowed it before she could remember that swallowing mystery pills from strangers was a bad idea. "That should take care of the pain. I had your clothing cleaned while you slept, and your bag is here."

Ari stared blankly at her backpack, fairly certain she'd left it in the dorm after her last final. _Weird._ She looked at the woman, who was carrying her clothes back to her. "Thanks. Where am I? Sorry, I think I drank more than I should have last night."

"Most definitely more than you should have," the woman said. "You're in my clinic on the Wards. I'm Dr. Chloe Michel. A couple of Asari brought you in last night, you're lucky it was them who found you."

"Wait...Asari? You're joking, right?" Ari stared at her. _ Asari? Who does she think she's kidding?_

The "doctor" gave her a weird look before replying. "I know that many have difficulty accepting other species, but you're lucky they found you before you could be hurt. You were passed out on the Presidium, and C-Sec would have let you wake up in a holding cell if they'd found you."

Ari stared. Then she passed out.

* * *

><p>This time she just stared at the ceiling after waking up. <em>Okay. So, Dr. Michel, a fictional character from my favorite video game series, is claiming I'm in her fictional Med-Clinic, on the fictional Citadel. And that it was asari who saved me. Either I'm crazy, or I'm the protagonist of a Mass Effect fan fiction. Neither is a good thing.<em>

"Ah, good, you're back. Here are your belongings, there's a bathroom where you can shower and change through that door," Dr. Michel pointed and then went back to paperwork.

A quick shower and change of clothes later, Ari was slightly more capable of rational thought. "Right. I should definitely get money, and a place to sleep. Food after that. Water before food, and..." Her train of thought derailed into musing about ponies, and she figured getting a move on would be for the best.

"Dr. Michel, thanks again! If you ever need help with completely menial, non-skill-requiring tasks, just let me know," Ari emerged from the bathroom and smiled somewhat nervously at the doctor.

"Of course. Take care of yourself, and remember that liver transplants are not fun!" Chloe smiled and waved her along from her desk, and Ari headed for the door.

* * *

><p>It was definitely disorienting looking at the sights, comparing everything to how it looked in the game. First order of business: money. She headed for the nearest bench, sitting down and putting her backpack on the ground at her feet. <em>I'm pretty damn certain I left this at home, so whoever (or whatever) dumped me in Mass Effect Land must have brought this along for a reason. Right?<em>

The first thing she noticed was that her mp3 player was missing. _Not cool. I'd better be able to download the Aggrolites in this place, or I'm gonna hunt down the asshole who did this and beat him in the face with a dead salmon._

After her initial outrage was passed, Ari started pulling out items. One futuristic-looking version of her wallet, complete with ID and something that might be a credit chip; a book called "So You're New to the Citadel: Living and Working in the Galaxy's Cultural Melting Pot;" a data pad; and a techno-gauntlet thingy that was probably an omni-tool. Her bar of Trader Joe's chocolate was also there, thank god.

After a short minute of fiddling, the data pad was active, and she was imagining creative ways to kill the sonofabitch who landed her in this situation.

_To Miss Arianna Louise Harrison;_

_By now, you have realized that you are no longer in the universe you grew up in. I apologize for any distress caused by your relocation, but it was necessary. Your parents died before they could tell you that you were adopted, but you've certainly had your suspicions, haven't you?_

_I hope you will settle into this, your original home. Your experiences in the world of your childhood will enable you to fulfill your destiny. Be warned, any use of your knowledge to change future events could severely damage the very fabric of reality._

_You'll find an account in your name at the United Citadel Bank. One hundred thousand credits have been deposited; after that's gone, you'll have to find your own money. I've also arranged an apartment in the Presidium Wards, where I imagine you are right now. It isn't furnished, as I though you'd wish to choose your own bed, but I left what belongings of yours I could find there._

_Best Wishes_

Ari spent the next five minutes concentrating on breathing slowly and not screaming. A turian sitting nearby gave her an odd glance as her leg starting bouncing with nervous energy while she desperately tried not to have a panic attack. Ari _was not_ a fan of having decisions made for her, and there was a god damned _turian _giving her odd looks. Disgruntled hipster college students she could handle; aliens were outside her realm of expertise.

After regaining control of herself, Ari pulled out the book and checked the index for references to Omni-tools. Fifteen minutes of reading, and she could access the Citadel NewsNet, public access extranet, and a series of how-to manuals stored in her omni-tools memory. A few quick experiments later, and she pulled up an extranet site for finding jobs on the citadel. In fact, it was remarkably similar to Craig's List. The job availabilities on the Presidium Wards were a bit limited. Most people wanted to hire skilled laborers, and Ari was not confident that she could fake it till she made it.

Finally she narrowed it down to five possibilities: server at Chora's Den (least favorite option), clerk at Expat's shop, clerk at a gaming store, waiter at a burger joint, or cashier at a women's boutique. Deciding to get as much done as possible before her inevitable nervous breakdown, Ari headed towards the clothing store to pick up an application.

* * *

><p>Expat had been more than willing to excuse her relative ignorance of "modern" technology after he came to the predictable conclusion that she was from the colonies. In fact, he very carefully explained how to demo all of his mods and other products over the course of her first day in his shop, which happened to start a half hour after she applied. Apparently he liked her. Either that, or he figured a colonial would be easier to underpay. Finally, though, her shift was done and she could go search for her apartment.<p>

A few subtle questions had confirmed that the Battle of the Citadel had yet to take place, and Commander Shepard was not yet a household name in every bit of Citadel space. Extranet searches had confirmed that Aiden Shepard grew up on Mindoir and was the hero of blitz. Knowing the place in the time line helped her feel more secure, and less like she needed to be ready to dodge geth attacks at any time. A handy program on her omni-tool gave her a map that showed her location in any Ward on the Citadel (thank you, C-Sec). Of course, she still got lost in under five minutes once she left the areas she explored in Mass Effect.

"Um, excuse me, officer," Ari tried to get the attention of the first figure in C-Sec blue she saw, a turian who was glaring at a group of shifty humans.

"What?"

_Oh shit, it's Garrus. Fucking GARRUS VAKARIAN is glaring at me. I think I need to sit down._ Ari landed on her ass with an undignified _oof_ and stared up at Garrus with a dazed expression. His glare turned to concern and he crouched next to her, eyes obviously checking for injuries.

"Are you alright? Were you mugged? Do you need medical assistance?"

"No, no, sorry," Ari said, flushing as she tried to find her feet and stand up.

Garrus grabbed her hand and pulled Ari to her feet, chuckling lightly as Ari squeaked in surprise. _He is a hell of a lot stronger than he looks. I feel like a child._

"I'm sorry, I think I'm just a little overwhelmed. I seem to have lost the way to my apartment," Ari nervously brushed off her jeans, even more aware of how weird she must look compared to the residents of the Citadel. _Not that I'll be wearing a Consort-style dress or any of the other absurd and/or ugly clothes these crazies are donning anytime soon. Well, I might rip of Kasumi's style, or Jack's pants...Right, brain back on topic!_

Garrus was looking at her with a faint smile (she thought it was a smile), noticeably amused at her distraction. "First time on the Citadel?"

"Erm...yes. I just arrived last night, and haven't even had the chance to find where I'm supposed to be living. It's apartment three-oh-three in the...Golden Gate Gardens? I'm Ari Harrison, by the way," Ari double checked the address, wondering if the reference to the city she'd grown up just north of was coincidence.

"Really? I'm in three-fifteen. It's a nice complex, how'd you get a place there without ever visiting?" Garrus tugged he arm and set off, expecting her to follow.

"Um...a friend of the family set it up last time they were here," Ari said, quickening her steps to keep up. She noticed he was heading back in the direction she'd come from, and soon enough they emerged near the plaza she'd run through a thousand times in game. "Apparently I went in the completely wrong direction, since I started out in the markets."

"Don't worry about it. Most newcomers get turned around in these halls. Garrus Vakarian, of C-Sec which you've probably noticed," Garrus said. He took off down a corridor that didn't exist in-game, and after a short walk, they were at a large set of doors. He turned to device and swiped what she guessed was his key. "Come on, I'll take you to the manager. Just don't tell my superiors I took this much of a detour off my patrol."

Ari glanced around the lobby in shock. It wasn't the Ritz, but there was a rug over what looked like hardwood floors, and a uniformed man standing at a counter in front of what must have been the mail area. Well lit and a comfortable temperature with soft classical music playing in the background, it was a hell of a lot nicer than anything she'd expected.

"Officer Vakarian, off duty so early?" The man asked, reaching behind him towards a mailbox.

"No need to get my mail yet, I'm just escorting a new tenant to see Valen. I'll be off again in a moment," Garrus said as he led Ari past the counter. "This is Ari, by the way. Ari, that's Bill, our daytime doorman. He's also handy with plumbing, if you have any trouble."

"Good to meet you," Ari called back as Garrus kept walking. Bill waved while pulling a datapad out of the desk and starting to read.

"Valen's a good manager. He keeps things running smoothly in here," Garrus explained, as he knocked on an actual door, the kind with a door knob and hinges instead of the wooshy-glowy kind. Garrus caught Ari staring incredulously. "Yeah, it's an old fashioned human door. That's basically the theme of the Garden. Not real wood, of course, but a nice change from the constant glowing and beeping at a cheaper place that hasn't been remodeled. Most places don't bother, because convincing the Keepers to leave renovations alone is a pain, but Valen seems to know how to work around their impulse to rearrange everything."

"Thanks for that, Garrus. Who's this?" A middle aged man in slacks and a tunic (like Udina's but less idiotic, Ari thought) stood in the doorway.

"Ari Harrison. I was told my apartment is in this complex?" Ari half-questioned, still not sure if she should believe that her abductor had arranged such obviously expensive accommodations.

"Of course! I've been expecting you," Valen smiled warmly, shaking her hand. "I expect you need to get back to work, Garrus?"

"Yes, Executer Pallin doesn't need another reason to climb up my ass," Garrus said, patting Ari's shoulder as he turned away. "See you around, Harrison. Don't get lost while I'm gone."

"That was totally not my fault!" Ari shouted at his retreating back, but he just laughed. _I'd like to dump you in 2012 San Francisco and see you try to navigate. Mean head._

A/N: So. There it is. My first chapter.

Exciting, eh?

PS: Not a Garrus romance, by the way. I'm not kinky like that, sorry.


End file.
